The Summary Judgment Reviews:
Title: Kill. Crush. Destroy.
Artist: Watchmaker
Label: Wonderdrug Records
Release Date: 11/6/01

Rating: 0 Skulls
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    • Reviewed by Redwolff (2/14/02):
    I love Wonderdrug Records. Every time I open my mailbox and see a slim, square package from them I smile in anticipation of truly cool shit. But this time? Oh my goodness. Watchmaker's CD was pure white and came in a white cover with a machine gun on it. The PR sheets were a transparency of a machine gun and a piece of yellow legal paper with red markings and coffee rings deliberately marring the typed bio. Sweet.

    I should have stopped there. I should have just admired the package and let the "music" alone. Here are my notes from listening to them one morning last week:

    I don't know what to do with this. You can't dance to it. You can't appreciate the lyrics because they're indecipherable. I can hardly bear to listen to it. I suppose you could mosh to it. Trying to find music within this CD is almost as difficult as finding a pattern in television snow. Put some musicians in a box, add bees and dogs and shake until frothy and pissed off. Then let them try to play music.

    Basically Watchmaker, who make "technological noise" according to their PR, scream over repeated minor chords and unimaginative hardcore drumming, which is far too high in the mix. When I was an angst-ridden teenager I would have embraced this album as another way to torture my exhausted parents. They wouldn't have understood why I liked Watchmaker. Now that I'm an adult, I don't.
    0 out of 5

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