The Classic Metal Album Reviews:
Title: Them
Artist: King Diamond
Label: Roadrunner
Release Date: 1988

Rating: 5 Skulls
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    • Death's Review:
    In honor of his headline appearance this weekend at Milwaukee Metalfest XIV, I pay tribute to King Diamond's best work, Them. For those who don't know the record, this album, King Diamond's third solo record after leaving Mercyful Fate (only to rejoin years later) of course smokes. Killer, killer riffing and amazing leads appear throughout. "Welcome Home" alone is enough to end the debate over Them's worth, with premium late-eighties riffing on par with Megadeth's "Holy Wars" and other examples of the genre's best. Mikki Dee's drumming is outstanding on this record, displaying a fluid and sweeping command of what sounds like a gigantic kit, of which Dee always commands full use.

    But, of course, 'tis the King who truly shines. With Them, King Diamond spins his most immersive tale, a great story expertly told through a musically adventurous vessel. The passion with which he delivers even the most routine lines ("They're going to repaint . . . the front door SOOOOON!!!!"; since when is home refurbishing so dramatic??) is highly entertaining to say the least. Unfortunately for the King, his brand of horror-rock scares away the mainstream while Alice Cooper, Kiss and Marilyn Manson get played on the radio. Thus, Them is never mentioned on even the metal-oriented lists of the greatest concept records.

    But Them belongs on those lists: It is, as far as I can tell, one of the only pure thrash/speed metal concept albums (except perhaps King's own Abigail or Conspiracy, Them's follow-up). And its complete musicality and tight headbanging delivery assure this a place on the list of great technical speed metal records of all time without regard to lyrical content. Still, the focus must remain on the King's masterful dramatic performance, and its distinct character annunciations and intensive involvement on every track. Them is the work of a true original making his definitive performance. We can only hope that a fraction of the magic captured on Them will grace our presence in Milwaukee this weekend. Is it time for tea? I can't wait to find out.
    5 out of 5
    DEATH  Email Death

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